Brightest Star in the Darkest Sky
by xFauxdilocksx
Summary: And as I raise the small green item to my lips, all I can think of is that I'd rather be with her in death than without her in life... WARNING: This short OneShot contains dark themes of drug use, self-harm, and suicide. Rated M for dark themes.


***A/N- WARNING: This short OneShot contains dark themes of drug use, self-harm, and suicide: If this affects you badly in any way then I recommend that you don't read.***

**I'm a great believer in the spirit world, but I'm aware that some people are not, so some of you may find the ending a little unrealistic. But that's okay, it's just different beliefs, you know.**

_Flashbacks in Italics._

**Brooke's POV.**

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Brightest Star in the Darkest Sky…

The room is dark, the curtains are closed, the door is closed tightly.

The sheets still smell like her.

The red linens stained a darker red with blood.

I didn't find her here.

"_Peyton, open the door please. I know you're in there, just open the door!"_

_Nothing._

"_Just please open the damn door!"_

_Her record player had been on for so long that the needle had slipped from the disk._

"_Brooke…"_

_I turned around to see my friend Haley stranding there as white as a sheet, three envelopes in her hand._

_Dad. _

_Brooke._

_ My Friends._

"_No… NO!"_

_I was never a big believer in the effects of adrenaline; I thought it was a myth, an exaggeration, until that moment._

_I ran to the bathroom door, and I will never know how, but I rammed it with my shoulder until the lock bust and came flying from the door at the other side._

_I didn't even consider what I'd see behind that door until I swung it open…and that's when I found her._

It started on a Monday.

Lucas had proposed to Lindsey days earlier.

I don't know what transpired on that fateful Monday, only that she'd told Lucas she'd let him go so that he could be happy.

Only she never would be.

Ever.

I remember walking into her office that night.

It was way past midnight.

And all I could see was her head slumped on her desk, her curly hair sticking to her face from dried up tears…

And the empty cocaine vial lying flat in front of her face.

The start of a downward spiral.

'_Peyton, you're soaking wet, where the hell is your car?!" _

_She shrugged carelessly._

_I could see from her eyes that she was wasted again._

_The drugs had taken hold of her._

_Her weight was rapidly dropping, her eyes were sunken, and her skin was deathly pale._

_And the worst part was; no one except me seemed to notice._

"_Don't know, Tric probably."_

"_Peyton, I know you're hurting, but this has to stop!"_

"_There's nothing wrong with me…"_

"_The drugs Peyton, you have to stop it! You're hurting yourself, you need help!"_

"_I need to go away." _

_Had I known the true meaning behind those words, maybe she would still be here._

Her vial is still laying here beside her bed, and even in the darkness, I can still see it's evil green glint.

Picking it up, it's a sorry reminder of what my best friend's life became, but another part of me wants to hold onto it tightly as a reminder of her.

It's empty, and it's ironic.

Her bedroom feels different now.

It's cold.

It's lonely.

It holds such a negative energy.

But for me, it's my safety from the world.

She spent the final hours of her life here, and I will too.

"_Please stop it Peyton, there are people out there who love you, don't hurt yourself like this."_

_I walked into her bedroom; she had a razor blade._

_Her arms were cut in long vertical lines, the blood trickling down, leaving blots on her bed linens._

_It wasn't the first time I'd saw it, I was used to it now._

_We'd seen doctors, and therapists, but everything we were given was counteracted by the effects of the drugs; s__omething I couldn't stop her from taking._

_I suggested rehab, there was a waiting list._

_I had nothing. _

"_People who love me? Like who?" She asked, her eyes heavy, that tell-tale vial lying empty on her night stand._

"_I love you, your Dad loves you…"_

"_Does Lucas love me, does Haley love me…?" She retaliated._

_I didn't know what to say._

_Yes, yes they did, but things had gotten very tangled recently, and I hadn't yet told them the full extent of her drug dependency._

_It wouldn't have helped either way._

"_They do Peyton, it's just…" _

"_Liar!"_

_Then she pushed the razor blade deep into her arm, sending blood splattering over her bed sheets._

_We spent that night in E.R._

The worst thing a person can ever see in their life is the mental deterioration of a person they love.

Peyton's life was hard, from birth till death.

You could even go so far as to say that her mental deterioration was an inevitability.

But it didn't make it any easier.

Especially remembering when she was happy.

"_It's you Peyton."_

"_What?"_

"_It you. The one I next to me when all my dreams come true. It's you."_

_It watched from afar as she got her boy._

_The boy she loved._

_The boy who eventually broke her heart._

_How happy she was in that moment made our fight seem so irrelevant and silly._

_I watched as her smile lit up her whole face._

_The sad thing is, the amount of times that I saw that smile after that, I could count on one hand._

Her note lies beside me.

Her suicide note.

And I don't know if I can bring myself to open it.

I could go without knowing her last words to me.

Or I could read it, and die with a broken heart.

But I suppose I already have a broken heart.

_I pushed open the door, and that's when I saw her._

_The bath tub was filled deep enough that she'd almost sunk under the crimson red water._

_She was deathly white, and I could tell just by looking at her that she was cold._

_Her right arm lay draped over the edge of the tub, t__he wound so deep that a pool of blood had gathered on the floor._

"_Peyton!" _

_I jumped into the tub, my shoes and coat still on, and cradling her in my arms, I lifted her out._

_I yelled for Haley to call an ambulance as I held her in my arms and cried into her wet, blonde, curls._

_But I already knew it didn't matter._

_She was dead._

That was almost 10 hours ago.

The forensics and the police were here.

They quickly ruled it a tragic suicide.

And here I lie on her bed, her cocaine vial in one hand, her suicide note in the other.

And by my side, my own suicide note, and a bottle of arsenic based household rat poison.

Ripping her note open with my finger nail, I stare at her last words to me.

'My dearest Brooke,  
No matter what happens, no matter what you do, I hope that you will always stay the same, I hope you will always be you. You are so special, and no one can take that away from you, so when the problems come and the darkness falls, never forget that there are people out there who care about you.  
Never forget your dreams; they aren't as far away as you might think they are.  
Let nothing get you down, and when times get rough or you start to feel sad, simply smile like the circus clown I know you are.  
And most importantly, never forgot that I am still with you, every single day. Until that day when we can build a snow fort together in the sky, I will miss you and love you always.  
Always remember, I'm only a thought away.  
P Sawyer.'

I decided in the moment that I found her that a world without Peyton Sawyer is a world that I don't want to live in, and in reading her note, I realise that a world without her is I world that I cannot survive in.

The vial in my hand is small, but large enough for a fatal shot of poison.

I drop the poison into the vial one little drip at time, mentally preparing myself for what will be my end.

And as I raise the small green item to my lips, all I can think of is that I'd rather be with her in death than without her in life.

Laying back against the pillows, I can feel my body start to fade.

I'm starting to struggle for breath as my lungs begin to shut down.

But I'm not afraid.

I'm happy.

And what I saw before I took my last breath wasn't darkness, but a glimmer of bright white light.

. . .

The strangest thing is being in attendance at your own funeral.

You linger in the back, afraid that you'll be seen, even though you're a spirit and invisible to the living eye.

There's a red casket, and a pink one.

The red one is hers, the pink one is mine.

They're burying us together.

Our friends and family are there, they're at the front of the church.

My heart breaks for our nephew as he holds two drawings, one is of him and me, the other of him and Peyton. I know his drawings will be buried with us.

Larry Sawyer is heartbroken, but although he cannot see her, Peyton is there by his side, comforting him.

But the one thing that makes it all worth it; Peyton. She's finally free.

"You want to get out of here?"

I turn around and there she is.

She's glowing.

Her skin is tan, her cheeks are rosy.

Her hair is in her signature curls, and she's wearing a brilliant white summer dress.

She's the best version of herself.

"Come on.." She laughs, then she disappears through the chapel doors.

I turn around to look at my friends and family again.

I'll miss them dearly, I already do, but I'm in heaven… literally.

And I'll always be with them.

I'm only a thought away.

Taking one last glance back, I disappear out the door after Peyton.

Outside, it's snowing heavily, and she's on the grass in the church grounds.

"Hey B Davis, I made you a snow fort."

I smile wide.

Yes, there was no way I was going to stay among the living, when I can be here with her, being part of the brightest star in the darkest sky.

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**Reviews will be very much appreciated for this one, it was a toughy…**


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